Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine’s Day from the bottom of my heart to all of you for the prayers, supportive words, and kind acts you have all shown us. We would never have gotten through this past year without you all.

Valentine’s Day this year has taken on a new meaning to me. The focus is no longer on romantic love, but on the unconditional love between a parent and child. This year my heart is so sad. I am not as discouraged by yesterday’s report as some may expect. I have complete faith and trust in all of the doctors, nurses and staff at the Floating Hospital that they have the expertise and passion to come up with a new plan for Mac that we pray will be more effective. For those of you who have children in their lives you know the helpless feeling you get when they are sick; that is what I feel every day when I look at both of my boys. Except in a “normal” family when a child is sick you know in a little while they will feel better and go on living their childhood. I see my boys and know they will never get “better” they will never get their childhood back. Cancer has stolen that from them with all that they have seen, experienced and felt. When I look at Mac I pray that he will get better instead of worse. I pray that both boys never feel as scared as I do about the future.

I would give anything in the world to trade places with Mac. I would give anything to take away the past year of surgeries, radiation, and treatments from Mac and the experience of watching his little brother and best friend go through hell for Liam. I feel so helpless, so for now I will just continue praying in the end all this pain will be worth the reward we will enjoy as a much closer and more appreciative family.